Lonesome Rant...

I ink my words
With blood,
Taken from
The pouring shards
Of my glass-sharp heart,
And feel
With every tacit tear
That sears a trail
To the corners
Of my frowning lips...

And I realize
That when I'm staring
Myself down in a mirror,
Eternities from now,
Wondering when
My skin decides to riot
With weakened wrinkles,
I'll see my name engraved
In every worming dust...

[And it isn't that
I won't recall
Every waiting glance;
It's just that I don't think
It'd be any easier on me
To see you passing by
With my eyelashes
Dusted off]...

I bet I could jump
A million moons
And still wind up
With emptiness in my eyes...
Yet you never
Seemed to be
As close as
You did,
When you wore an eye
That only I could feel...

And the distance
That you put forth
To keep your hands
From mine
Never seemed
To be so huge
For I never wanted
To watch you leave;
I'd much rather be dead...

[And it isn't that
You're only one
Small thought away;
It's just that I know
I could reach out my arms
To hug the universe,
Yet I'd still be blind
If I could never see
Your face again]...

I remember
Less and less
Of how it was
To be loved by you;
Even as
I remember
So very vividly
Why it was
I fell for you
In the first place...

And all the prayers
Of memory,
That once were raked
So neatly,
Travel further from
My veranda
With every day
We spend apart...

...[For it isn't that
My memories
Don't usually put
A smile in my heart;
It's just that I don't know
If I can be
Myself without you any longer]...